March 2008 Archives
Those of you who saw me on Wednesday night saw a nearly broken man. I had sold only about 150 tickets (these things are usually sold out by the Wednesday before), and, having expected to sell numerous tickets at the Black Sheep that night, I sold one. There was no hope of getting help from the TV or the papers. There was no money in the budget for advertising. The Inquirer, after making overtures of doing a story on it, backed off. The Weekly and the City Paper decided not to cover it for the first time ever. After three straight classics, it looked like Quizzo Bowl IV was gonna be a dud. And it would be a failure in front of the Burnin' Loves, a band made up of guys I had grown up with. But, in a show of what an incredible community we have, things started to turn around, Blues Brothers style. Trivia Art posted a contest on Foobooz, D-Mac did the same on PhiladelphiaWillDo. Dark Horse John sent a message to his listserve. Jam Master Sean told the RPS crowd. Chip posted bulletins on Myspace, as did Steve O., Smackdown, and the Lovely Ginger. Gabe and Andy at the Temple Law School posted flyers all over the facility, while I posted them on bulletin boards, walls and bathroom doors at Temple and Penn. Despite being ignored by the press, the buzz started to spread, and by the time doors opened at the Blue Horizon at 7 p.m., a sea of people poured through. In the end, it worked out incredibly. I had set up 38 tables of 8 eight each, and in the end every seat was filled, for a total of 304 people, our 4th consecutive Quizzo Bowl sellout.
As for the event itself, it was legendary. The Burning Loves opened sans Black Elvis, and got the crowd warmed up with a few classics, such as "Hard to Handle" and "Me and Bobby McGee". JGT broke his promise of not rapping, and opened with "Mama Said Knock You Out". Then we began a rather difficult easy round. Of the 38 teams, only one, Dork Sided, got all 12 questions correct. The much maligned defending champs, the Sofa Kingdom, aced Round Two, and took the lead after the first two rounds. It was then time for the halftime show, featuring Chip Chantry and the Legendary WID. Chip's set went pretty well, despite the fact that the audio was a little off in the old building. Then came the WID. I wish he had performed on stage instead of in front, because I think some people in the back couldn't really see what was going on.
Long story short, he got sha-na-nad off the stage, despite pulling out two stuffed lions, and saying "Hey, I've got my pride," then dry humping one of the lions and saying, "What do you think I'm F****** Lion?" (How is that not hilarious? I just don't get you people.) There are already talks of a "WID's Revenge" show, so stay tuned.
On to Round Three, the wild card round. After starting off slowly, two time champions the Champs (aka Rob's Zombies) were one of only two teams to pull off a perfect round, and moved within a question of the lead heading into the final round. The other team to have a perfect round three, Lambda Lambda Lambda had a narrow lead, with 71 points. MAGMA was close behind with 69, and Blowback Chicken Army (featuring Triva Art, D-Mac, Smackdown, and a few Western Omelette's) were in 3rd with 68. The Kingdom and the Zombies both had 67. Dork Sided, looking for the upset, was still within a question of the lead, with 66.
Meanwhile, between rounds, Black Elvis had completely caught fire. His booming voice and the bands rollicking play had the place rocking. Suspicious Minds was amazing, Hound Dog was downright nasty, and they ended the night by getting away from the Elvis with a little Chuck Berry "Johnny B. Good". By the end of the night, the nerd elite were dancing in the aisles. Unreal.
But back to the action. Round Four, which kicked off with Eye of the Tiger playing in the background, was a doozy. When the dust settled, the Resevous Dogs aka The Jams, with an impressive final round, had moved to 5th place. MAGMA finished in 4th. Rob's Zombies, despite losing their effervescent leader during the previous year (I missed him eating other peoples food while taking his table at this year's Quizzo Bowl. And great team name. I am quite certain that would approve.), finished an impressive third. So it came down to two teams. The defending champs the Sofa Kingdom and Steve O.'s team, Lambda Lambda Lambda. The crowd began banging on the tables as I prepared to read off the winners, followed by an actual drum roll. Ladies and gentlemen, "Your 2008 Quizzo Bowl Champions...Lambda Lambda Lambda!"
The crowd went wild, the Kingdom hung their heads, and the Lambdas began jumping up and down as if they had just made the Final Four. The Kingdom hung their heads as if their three pointer at the buzzer had grazed the iron. Unlike the Final Four, there were no TV news crews there to record the moment, no write-ups about it in the Sunday paper. But there is no denying that the Kingdom was overthrown. The Revolution was not televised, but I'll be damned if it wasn't a hell of a lot of fun.
Digg It!
Hey gang, click here to see how your team did in Quizzo Bowl. (Scores have been fixed.)
Congratulations to your 2008 championship team, Lamda Lamda Lamda, at the 4th consecutive sold out Quizzo Bowl! I had fun. I hope you guys did too. Be back with a full wrap up, lots of photos, and a full scoreboard so you can see how your team did on Monday. I am now gonna kick back on the couch for the next 10 hours and watch basketball and baseball while eating unhealthy food and passing in and out of consciousness. If you got any good shots of last nights show, please send em to me. I'm gonna do a photo gallery manana.
Tickets are no longer available online. If you want to get tickets, show up at the Blue Horizon door at exactly 7 p.m. There are still a few left. And remember to bring a few bucks to tip your bartender with!
OK, gang, here is a final rundown of everything you need to know about the most prestigious Quizzo event in the history of the world.
- HOW TO GET TICKETS: Click here. There will be also be tickets at the door. However, I only have a certain amount of tables set up for teams. Once they are filled, doors close. I have about 220 sold and room for about 60 more people. To ensure yourself a seat, get your tickets now. If you are going to get your tickets there, I would suggest being there when doors open at 7 p.m. Online sales end tonight.
- WHERE: Legendary Blue Horizon (1314 North Broad Street) Cross street is Thompson, two blocks north of Girard. I will have cab numbers in the program so you can call for a cab after the event.
- WHEN: Tomorrow night! Doors open at 7 p.m., band comes on at 7:30 p.m., quizzo start at about 8:15 p.m.
- WHAT DO I GET FOR MY MONEY: For a mere $25, you get all you can drink Sly Fox (at least until we kick 6 kegs), Black Elvis, Chip Chantry, and the Legendary WID, probably my favorite comedian in Philly. Oh yeah, and a shot at the $1,000 purse. Also, I will have lots of gift certificates to give away in random drawings. In addition, the first 100 people through the door get a free copy of Mental Floss magazine. You will not find a better deal than this in Philadelphia this weekend. Or ever, for that matter.
- FOOD AND DRINK: Like I said, plenty of beer. Will also have several bottles of wine, for the
sissiesmore sophisticated palates. As far as food, I would suggest eating before you arrive. I will have soft pretzels, courtesy of the Philly Pretzel Factory, and some chips, but nothing too hearty. There will be also be food for sale at the afterparty. - AFTERPARTY: Going down at the Urban Saloon. Great bar, if you haven't already been. They are totally styling us out with $2.50 drafts and $3.50 imports and crafts. They will also have food for sale (they have good, inexpensive food).
- HOW DO I GET SO MUCH BANG FOR MY BUCK? Thanks to the sponsors on the right side of the page, we were able to keep prices extremely reasonable. I cannot thank them enough for their contributions to this event. I do ask that you please check them out when you get a chance.
Oh, and one more thing: I have known several member so the Burnin' Loves since I was about 5 years old. So tomorrow night is your chance to find out what a loser popular guy I was in high school. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask. This is gonna be a blast. Hope to see you there!
Anybody got a tap or a keg tub? Got two taps, but I wanna be safe in case one doesn't work. If you have, please contact me. Thanks.
ONEALS
- Lamda Lamda Lamda 106
- Young, Old and Restless 100
- Drinkin For Two 97
- We Got Nothin' 97
- Michale J. Fox...95
- Sofa Kingdom 114
- Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 102
- Western Omelette 101
- Fat Kids Always Win at See Saw 98
- Sop You Up with a Biscuit 80
- Barack and Angie (The Champs) 86
- A Man With No More Seasons (Jams) 84
- This Round Sponsored By...73
- But My Mom Says I'm Cool 67
- Spitzer Swallows 63
- Always $$ in a Banana Stand 107
- Duane's World 106
- Happy B-Day Sherpa 106
- Sara Goodtimes 94
- 4 Horsemen of Pinpocalypse 92
- Fort Awesome 89
- Dr. Girlfriend 85
- Shomer Shabbas 77
- Goodbye Egg McMuffin 70
- The Underachievers 6
- Off Like a Prom Dress 90
- Malibu Love Nest 87
- Not in Front of the Virgin 84
- Scissor Me Xerxes 81
- Youporn.com 69
Remember Mike Pomranz, the young man who blasted me in a letter to the editor a few weeks ago. Well, in a cruel twist of fate, he got press from the Inquirer last week. (Apparently open mic night at The Fire is newsworthy, but the largest and most prestigious team trivia event in the world is not. Not that I'm bitter.) Here's my favorite part: So why go to open mic? "To meet people and to find support," Pomeranz says with a laugh. No wonder he was laughing. "To meet people and find support" is a hilarious line, and it comes as no surprise that Mike came up with something so witty.
Apparently the surge in recognition had all sorts of folks just crawling out of the woodwork to be his Myspace friend, so he changed his status to private. Not just anybody can be Myspace friends with Mike Pomranz, author/signer/letter to the editor writer! No sir, it's an exclusive club, and only a few are allowed in his inner circle!
Anyways, he has emerged from an important meeting with his well-rounded, intellectual, and extremely urbane circle of Myspace friends to engage us with his thoughts on my last two columns, first the one on the NCAA tourney I did last week, then on the one I did on celebrity run-ins a few days ago. Click below to read Mike's take on the two columns.
One time only: No Sofa Kingdom, no Western Omelette, no Hurtin Bombs at the Bards. Oh, and D-Mac is hosting the wild card round. Should be pretty fun.
And don't forget, Good Dog at 8 p.m. See ya tonight!
The latest in the Metro is on Brushes with Greatness. What run-ins with celebrities have you had?
FOOD AND DRINK: The Philly Pretzel Factory is hooking us up with pretzels, and there will be other assorted snacks. As far as drinking is concerned, Sly Fox is providing us with their Helles Golden Lager, a German style lager, and their Seamus Irish Red Ale, which is a new red ale. I had one a few days ago for the first time and loved it. Beer is included in admission. They will also be serving food at the afterparty.
QUESTIONS: 12 questions per round, four rounds. Should be slightly more difficult than usual, but not ridiculously so.
TEAM SIZE: Up to 8. If you have a smaller team, no problem, we'll just team you up with another small group.
AFTERPARTY: Going down at Urban Saloon (21st and Fairmount). I know you guys'll be hungry by then, so they agreed to keep the kitchen open late. They're also giving us a great deal on drinks, with $2.50 domestics and $3.50 craft and imports.
GIVEAWAYS: In addition to the $1,000 purse, I have about over 15 gift certificates to give away to local restaurants with random drawings throughout the night. Also, the first 100 people through the door get a free copy of the latest issue of Mental Floss magazine.
HOW TO GET THERE: Here is a map of where the Blue Horizon is. Parking should be pretty easy, and the Broad Street Line will take you to Girard, which is two blocks away.
If you have any more questions, feel free to ask.
- It is a shot at Quizzo immortality. Anyone worth their salt in the quizzo world knows that the Champs won the first two and that the Sofa Kingdom won last year. If you win this year, your name will be forever ingrained in quizzo lore.
- Winning team walks with $600 cash and free memberships to Zipcar.
- Black Elvis's backup band The Burnin' Loves are, quite frankly, incredible musicians.
- The Blue Horizon.
- There will be a documentary crew on hand to cover the action, and you may very well be a movie star by this time next year. Well, maybe not a star. But you'll be like Paulie in Rocky.
- JGT quizzo shirts will be unveiled for the first time ever.
- It is the most fun thing going on in Philly this weekend, guaranteed.
- The Legendary WID is one of the funniest comedians I have ever seen in my life. If you like puns, you are gonna love the WID.
- Black Elvis.
- All you can drink Sly Fox beer and
a chance to see JGT rap. Nevermind that second part. JGT will not be rapping at this event.
I am in talks now to get these guys to perform at Quizzo Bowl V.
First off, it's cheaper. Internet sales ($25) end on Friday night, and on Saturday tickets at the door will be $30. Also, we will be setting up tables for 40 teams. Once those tables are filled, well, "Sorry folks, but parks closed. Moose outside shoulda told ya." Not trying to scare ya into buying tix, but just want to give you the dilly-yo. Of course, I will continue to have tickets for sale on me this week at quizzo, and you can still buy them online. If you have any questions about the event, feel free to post 'em below.
RELATED: FAQs about QBIV
I need to go to Royersford at some point to pick up these kegs, and need a truck to do it with. Let me know if you have one or know anyone who has one.
Ah yes, the first Quizzo Bowl. Ran a little long, but Nate Wiley and the Crowd Pleasers kept there from being a meltdown with their sweet soulful sounds. Johnny Cash impersonator The Man in Black did a great job kicking off the show, the bellydancer at halftime was a near disaster, and Where's Johnny (aka The Champs) edged the Sofa Kingdom, then making their first JGT quizzo appearance. Anyways, here's a few questions from the first big event.
- What did Vincenzo Peruggia steal in 1911, making him a national hero of sorts in his native Italy?
- Who are the only two players to win back to back Super Bowl MVPs?
- In what state did the Wounded Knee Massacre, take place in 1890?
- What fundamental discovery in the field of nuclear science did Sir James Chadwick make in 1932?
- What country do the Galapagos Islands belong to?
- Much of our knowledge about the Mount Vesuvius eruption of 79 AD comes from this Roman’s letter to the historian Tacitus?
- What sea is located on Turkey’s northern coast?
- How many laps are in the Daytona 500?
- How many golden tickets did willy wonka hide in chocolate wonka bars?
- What’s the name of Beethoven’s only opera?
A pretty interesting video on Philly.com yesterday about Quizzo Bowl sponsor Zipcar and their chief competitor Philly Car Share.
- Only One Version of Quizzo This Week! In other words, you can only play once this week. I just have too much stuff to do to get ready for Quizzo Bowl to write up two sets of questions.
- UPDATE: D-Mac to host wild card round at the Bards Thursday night. Should be pretty hilarious.
- Speaking of D-Mac, he and I teamed up with some lovely ladies to finish a disappointing 5th at Irish John's quizzo on Sunday night (that's us dejected, above, after the loss). But I rebounded on Monday, as Gabe and I joined Palestra Jon's team and set a new Dark Horse scoring record, missing only one question (In what country was St. Patrick born? We put Wales, and it was England).
- I will have tickets on me tonight at quizzo, so get your team right and get your tickets tonight.
One thing that will separate this Quizzo Bowl from those that have come before is the venue. After three years at the modern confines of the World Cafe Live, this year we'll be taking a trip back in time, as the event goes down at the hallowed Blue Horizon.
The Horizon was built in 1865 as three different row homes for the nouveau riche. In 1914, the buildings were adapted to house a Moose Lodge, whose presence is still felt. The lobby features a ticket booth built in 1914 with the Lodge's name and number still imprinted on the glass, and on one side of the stage you'll find a plaque honoring members of the local Moose Lodge that died in World War I. On the other side you'll find a bust of former "dictator" of the Lodge, John Ford.
The venue was converted to a church in the 1960s, and fights began being staged there in 1961. It quickly made a name for itself as a premiere boxing venue, with 33 World Champions boxing there, including Bernard Hopkins, Meldrick Taylor, and Tim Weatherspoon. In 1999 it was voted the Number One Boxing Venue in the World by the readers of Ring magazine. The Horizon is also used for a variety of parties and cabarets, but in its 143 year history, it has never played host to a major trivia event. Until Saturday, March 29th, 2008, when history will be made in a building already rich on it. BUY TICKETS NOW or see me tonight at quizzo.
On March 26th, 1965, a truck driver in Scranton lost control of a truck carrying bananas. This event inspired the song 30,000 Pounds of Bananas. What artist recorded the song?
Received the following e-mail this morning: Two years ago you entered the Kitchen Kettle Village "Best Rhubarb Dessert in Lancaster County" baking contest - you did not win, but you gave it a valiant effort. This year I would like to invite you to be a celebrity judge for the event. We are celebrating 25 years of rollicking rhubarb fun. I would love to have a fun person like you as one of the judges. Please let me know if it works in your schedule! It is kind of ridiculous how excited I am about this.
RELATED: Johnny's Near Monumental Upset Rattles Intercourse Pie Baking Community. (If you haven't read this already, please do. I really think it's one of my funniest stories.)
Here's a kind of fun video that includes Philly natives Tim and Eric, as well as Zach Galifinakis.
Just crossed the 100 tickets sold plateau. If you are interested in buying tix, either click here or come out to one of my quizzos this week. I will also be at the Dark Horse tonight at 9 p.m. with tickets on me. For more info on QB IV, click here.
...is absolutely and completely off the chain (though NSFW, thanks to Peedi Crak saying "F*** the Internet" We couldn't agree more.) I love Dice Raw (I used to go to his open mic at Five Spot) and have always wished he rapped more for these guys. Black Thought is so damn serious all the time he needs a hype man, and that's Dice. New album drops April 29th. Can't wait.
RELATED: The Roots on Myspace.
The point guard for Georgetown when they lost to Nova in 1985 had an interesting name. What was it?
Who hit the clutch 3 pointer in the final minute to lead Arkansas over Duke in the 1994 final?
In 1939, this school (which made this year's tourney) won the first ever NCAA tourney.
Who was the last team to enter the tournament undefeated? (year and school needed).
Stephen Curry has been the most exciting player in this year's tourney and has led Davidson to the Sweet 16. Where did his father Dell set several school records before becoming an NBA 6th Man?
Only two #11 seeds have ever made the Final Four. Who are they?
Alright, gonna post pics of last weeks winners, along with questions about the NCAA tourney. One guess per person. I'll have a write up about the standings in the 4th annual bracket-tacular a little later.
I've had several people say, "Well, we don't stand a chance at Quizzo bowl IV because we've only got three people on our team." Don't worry about that. We will be combining small teams into larger teams once people start arriving. I can all but guarantee that you will be on a team of 6-8 people. Don't sweat it. If you are looking to buy tickets to the grandaddy of them all, click here.
O'NEALS
- Dow Is Up 420 Points, Stoners Rejoice 105
- Young, Old, and Restless 95
- Dork Sided 86
- Bear Grylls Good, Bear Stearns Bad 75
- B-Sharps 72
- Lamda Lamda Lamda 114
- Sofa Kingdom 93
- Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 90
- Western Omelette 84
- Hulk Smash Quizzo 73
- Phil is Sick (aka the Jams) 99
- 2008: A Death Odyssey 90
- Is Quizzo Bowl a Registered Trademark 82
- No Name Team 81
- This is Not a Bus 65
- Hey, Remember LA Law? 94
- Duane's World 84
- CatDog 78
- Dirty Sanchez 73
- Yes You Can't 72
- Loose Seal 100
- Odd men Out 84
- Liquidity Crisis 72
- Shomer Shabbas
- Fort Awesome 66
- Western Omelette 118
- Hurtin Bombs 113
- Gladys the Groovy Mule 99
- I Gave Up Sex For Lent 87
- Sofa Kingdom 83
So I'm gonna be emceeing a basketball game that John Dougherty is gonna playing in tomorrow. It's a fund raiser at the gym where I coach. If you wanna see Johnny Doc's hoops skills, be at the Marian Anderson Rec Center (17th and Catherine) at 11 a.m. tomorrow. Oh, and if you wanna see my b-ball acumen (or lack thereof), be there at 3 p.m., when the other coaches and I play against the 16 year olds.
RELATED: In a somewhat pathetic move, Johnny tries to show off his glory days by linking to the JGT vs. AI in high school story for the second time in a week.
Damnit, damnit, damnit! Belmont played right with Duke the whole night last night, and then at the end, instead of playing to win, they played not to lose. They deserved the loss. Aaaargh! Man, it would have been a great upset. I know that the tournament committee hates a good upset. That's why they only gave 6 at large bids to mid-majors this year, as opposed to 12 just a few years ago, then matched up all the midmajors against each other in the first round so their wouldn't be any major upsets. But their efforts were almost in vain, because Belmont played so well. Damn, damn, damn. I'm still mad about the end of that game. The good news is that Duke is just not that good, and they'll be going down soon enough.
It was on this date in 1970 that Vinko Bogataj became the Agony of Defeat. Does it make me a bad person because I can't help laughing every time I see this?
The hero of morons all over the country is allowed to keep his sign on his window. As a pretty big fan of free speech I totally I agree with the ruling. It was ridiculous that this suit got filed in the first place. Sure, Vento may be so dumb that he makes comments about non-English speakers such as: "You don't wanna assimilate into dis country and learn our language? Well den you shouldn't uh came here den. Stay where you was." But that doesn't mean that Joey can't show off what a genius he with a sign in the window. After all, this is a free country. So congrats Joey. You are a hero, a hero to people in jean shorts and Minnie Mouse sweaters who swear they once saw the Virgin Mary on a slice of french toast. But to everyone in this city with an IQ over 40, you continue to be an embarrassment.
Gonna be giving away 2 free tickets to Quizzo Bowl tonight at both the Good Dog (8 p.m.) and the Brads 10:15 p.m. See ya then!
As you are well aware, the Legendary WID is going to be entertaining at the Quizzo Bowl. His opening act will be none other than JGT political correspondent Chip Chantry. Chip was named Philadelphia's 3rd Funniest Comedian in a contest that featured over 100 comics this past year at Helium. He would have won if he had been funnier. Chip is a regular at Helium and has played just about every venue between here and New York City, including a few firehouses. Chip's funny. You're gonna like him.
Here's my latest, sort of a B-ball tourney for dummies. I just hope Michael Pomranz likes it. Btw, I've also heard that his band, the Nuck Fuggets (sort of unsafe for work) are playing this Monday at the Troc, though that hasn't been confirmed by Mike himself.
It's the most wonderful time of the year. Check out how young Larry Brown is here.
Just a quick reminder to get your bracket done before tomorrow at 11 a.m.!
I used to have a tradition of getting my best friend retro jerseys for Christmas. But not just any retro jersey, one of players who were bad or on teams that they didn't stay with long. For example, I gave him a Sean Kemp Cavaliers jersey and a Dennis Rodman Dallas Mavericks jersey. Then, a few years ago, it became impossible to get him said jerseys because the retro jersey fad took off, and suddenly a Sean Kemp Cavalier jersey was actually a desirable piece of clothing to have. Fortunately, the fad came back down to earth, and now jerseys of mediocre players are hilarious again, as is demonstrated by this amazing website. Oh, and Nat, if you're reading this, I've got a Jeff Hostetler Raiders jersey I've been meaning to mail you for a couple of years now. I'll get around to it someday.
With the Flyers tanking hard and the Sixers looking good but with nobody watching, tonight marks the first time many of you will pay any attention to pro sports in Philly since the Eagles were eliminated from the playoff hunt, due to the return of one of Philly's all-time most captivating athletes. Well, here's a few thoughts on the Sixers and AI: First of all, the Sixers are better off without him. This is a young, impressionable team that is going to learn a lot of positives from point guard Andre Miller, who came from Denver in the trade. Andre Miller isn't just "talkin 'bout practice", he's attending it. The Sixers are one good power forward away from being the 3rd or 4th best team in the East, and they should make a splash in the free agent market this offseason due in part to not having to pay AI an obscene amount of money. The "let's build a team around one guy" concept was intriguing, and worked for a year or two, but it is simply impossible to sustain in the NBA. See Kobe after Shaq and before Gasol. All in all, if I was attending, I would give him a hearty standing O, as I have been a fan of his hustle and heart for a long time. But I do think he's a bit overrated, as he takes a ton of absolutely terrible shots every game. And, as a coach of impressionable youngsters, I'd rather not have him as a role model in my city. I appreciate the "keeping it real" stuff when it came to fashion and friends, but kicking down doors with a gun while looking for your wife? Yeah, I'm not really into that, and we haven't really had to deal with a lot of that from Andre Miller and Andre Igoudala.
RELATED: JGT vs. AI in high school b-ball in Virginia. (True Story!)
Yesterday was Irene Cara's birthday, and in honor of that I'd like to present a short clip my heartwarming performance of Flashdance at last year's Quizzo Bowl, complete with leg-warmers, the headband, and the now infamous dumping of the tickets. What kind of horrifying surprises will we find at this year's bowl? There's only one way to find out.
The good people at the Locust Rendezvous have agreed to help sponsor Quizzo Bowl IV. The Vous, the site of Wednesday night quizzo on Broad and Locust, has some of the best drink prices in Center City, and is a great place to see the games with their new HDTVs. The NASCAR-ation of this event continues! But again, without local companies helping out, $25 for an amazing show and all you can drink would have been impossible. So please check out the companies to the right when you get a chance.
Alright guys, hard to believe, but this is the 4th year we're doing this jawn. Here's how it works: You click here, follow the instructions (Password is Goodtimes. You do need a Yahoo account to join, but it only takes a minute to get one), and you're in. It's free to enter. The person who finishes with the highest score will receive a $50 gift certificate from Barristers, a $25 gift certificate to the Mexican Post, and a $25 gift certificate to Ortlieb's Jazz Haus ($100 total, in case you're bad at math). Barrister's will have all 63 games on their multiple high def TVs. If you wanna keep an eye on all of the games and not go to the worst bar in Philly, I highly suggest Barristers. Great food, great TVs, plus drink specials. 2nd place will get a $40 gift certificate to the Black Sheep, and 3rd will get a $10 gift certificate to O'Neals. Past winners include Stacie from the Champs, Eric of the Rocket Scientists, and yours truly (I won the first one, but finished 64th out of 75 teams last year.) Got to get your picks in by noon on Thursday! Good luck!
Ok, you know the basics. Saturday, March 29th at the Blue Horizon on 1314 North Broad Street. Kickoff at 8 p.m. Here are a few of the questions I've been getting.
Where can I get tickets?
You can purchase them from me at each of my events this week, or you can purchase them online here.
How much are tickets?
I have always made an effort to keep Quizzo Bowl Tickets as cheap as possible while ensuring that I don't totally lose my ass. The $25 per ticket in advance ($30 day of the show) is actually the best deal ever, as it will include not only the show, but also your drinks for the evening, courtesy of Sly Fox.
Why should I pay for this one when I can play for free anywhere else?
I see this as a huge party celebrating the community we've built over the years, unlike any other event in the world. There is no Quizzo Bowl in NYC, none in DC, and none in LA. There is only Quizzo Bowl, and it will only be found at one place in 2008: the Blue Horizon in Philadelphia, PA on March 29th.
How many people can I have on a team?
Up to eight. In order to make seating as easy as possible (no assigned seating this year), I do ask that you please try to come as close to 8 as possible.
Is it going to be difficult to get to the Blue Horizon?
No, the Blue Horizon is roughly a mile north of City Hall. I have been there on nights that were busier than Quizzo Bowl and did not have trouble finding parking. If you are taking SEPTA, take the Broad Street line to Girard. It is then a two block walk North of Girard.
Will the questions be harder than usual?
Yes, a little bit. This is, after all, the Grandaddy of them all. But not unbearably, overwhelmingly hard.
Will there be food at this event?
Light snacks will be provided. The Philly Pretzel Factory is hooking me up with a great deal on pretzels, so we should have a fair amount of those, but I would suggest grabbing a bit before you leave the house. There will be some late-night snacks for sale at the Urban Saloon afterparty.
Will this be one of the most fun nights in Philadelphia this year?
Yes, guaranteed.
Will you be wearing a garish outfit at this event, Johnny?
No, I will be dressed quite plainly.
What's up with all of this sponsorship? Are you selling out on us Johnny?
Absolutely. To rent the room, get the band I wanted, get a halftime host, come up with prize money, buy all of the kegs, etc. tickets would have been at least $50. But thanks to our sponsors, tix are a ridiculously cheap $25. That is why I do ask that you please take a moment to check out our sponsors on the right hand side of the page, because they really did make this event possible.
What will the winners get?
There is a $1,000 purse. Winners get $600 plus free memberships to Zipcar, 2nd place gets $300, 3rd place gets $100.
What time should I show up?
Doors open at 7, band will start around 7:30, and quizzo will start at 8:15 p.m.
What time do you think we'll be done?
Gonna try to be done sometime between 10:30-11 p.m.
Will you be rapping at this event, Johnny?
Damnit, you just won't let this one die, will you? No, no I won't rapping at this event. I know I said that before Quizzo Bowls 1,2, and 3, but this year I mean it!
If you have any more questions, post them below.
Found the spot for the Quizzo Bowl afterparty. The Urban Saloon, a short cab ride from the Blue Horizon, will be the home of the post bowl bash, and they are hooking us up with $2.50 domestics and $3.50 crafts and imports for the event. They will also be keeping the kitchen open late just for us with a few late night snacks. As those of you who played the City vs, City Smackdown in December can attest, it's a great bar, and will be a great spot to unwind after the big event.
Hey gang, the good people at Mental Floss magazine have sent me 100 copies of their upcoming edition to give away at Quizzo Bowl. 
Who once lived at 1511 North 33rd Street in Philadelphia?
The economy is going completely into the toilet and Wall Street is being bailed out by Bush while homeowners are left on their own, but who cares? We have more sex talk! Apparently, Jim McGreevey and his wife used to do the wild thing with another guy. Here's the money line from that one: "We called it the Friday Night Special," Pedersen said. The "intense" escapades, he said, usually began with a "couple of drinks" at a local T.G.I. Friday's and culminated in "a hard-core consensual sex orgy" between the three of them at McGreevey's Woodbridge condo. What? Are you serious? They ate at TGI Fridays? Well, that's Jersey for ya.
Oh, and the new governor of New York, he used to cheat on his wife, too. As for Ashley Dupre, well she's raking in the money off her dope new song.
Gotta work on my column for the Metro, but in a little while I'm gonna put up our annual bracket challenge. Got a few gift certificates to give away. So check back soon.
Here's some fun St. Patties Day facts for you to kick around. And oh by the way, who in the hell was this St. Patrick we've been hearing so much about? Finally, here are a few facts about corned beef.
This Irish author burst onto the scene as a 67 year old in 1997, and doesn't use quotation marks in his writing.
This Irishman wrote "Waiting for Godot".
This lead singer of the Boomtown Rats put together Live 8.
This actor played Alexander the Great in the movie Alexander.
This Irish actor played the title character in Remington Steele.
What did Irish architect James Hoban create a design for in 1792?
Alright, since this is amateur nig St. Patrick's Day, I'm gonna ask questions about the Irish under pics of last week's winners. One guess per person.
O'NEALS
- He Who Speaks to Spear Tooth 96
- We Got Nothing 87
- Young, Old and Restless 67
- Buzztime Tattoo 59
- Johnny Bettertimes 57
- Sofa Kingdom 110
- Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 108
- Clients #10 and #11 80
- Cutz Dat Flo 69
- Um, I Think You Did Hook Up W/ Him 53
- Ganjer or Mary Anne (aka Jams) 114**
- Trust Us We Know 101
- 1022 85
- Someone Went Corporate 74
- Grady Bunch 69
- Duane's World 108
- Spitzer Swallows: Prince of Thieves 99
- The Original Spitzer Swallows 88
- Emperors Club VIP 86
- Trashtastic 82
- MAGMA 111
- Shomer Shabbas 83
- The Underachievers 81
- Lucille II 63
- The Misfitz 50
- Western Omelette 104
- Hurtin Bombs 100
- Rather have a bottle in front of me...100
- Sofa Kingdom 95
- Yes You Can't 83
**Had a perfect score going into final question. Missed "Who sings Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots?" Answer was Flaming Lips.
The Metro received quite possibly the greatest letter ever after my column on Thursday. While I will admit that Thursday's piece wasn't my strongest work, I am frankly flattered that it inspired this young writing genius, Michael Pomranz, to respond with a diatribe that was longer than the piece itself. For your reading enjoyment, I have provided footnotes. You're gonna like this:
Dear Involved Parties:
On Thursday, March 13, 2008, the Philadelphia Metro printed a column by author Johnny Goodtimes under the heading Goodtimes File entitled "Johnny Oldtimes".
Rarely in my life am I privy to reading such uninspired hack (1). How being a "local quizmaster and blogger" qualifies someone to be a comedian, or even a commentator, is beyond me, and this article further confounded the decency of my senses (2).
Not only has this bit been played out by every comedian on the face of the planet (3) -- let's be honest, if this is the first time you've seen or heard the "things I know 'cause I am old that young people don't know about and boy is that funny" bit, you may want to resign as an editor, or figure out why VH1 is blocked by your cable provider (4) -- but given the opportunity to mine humor from it, Mr. Goodtimes (5) instead foregoes any inspiring commentary and simply settled for compiling a boring list.
For example: "They don't remember when the Berlin Wall fell." Wow? They don't? That's probably because they weren't alive then (6). How about turning it on itself to say something like: "When they hear about the falling of the Berlin Wall, they think it sounds easy. That thing didn't fall on its own. It took a lot of Germans with pickaxes to bring that sucker down.(7)"
See, Johnny. That is called adding humor and perspective (8). The topic is still a bit hacky, but at least I added some personal spin on it (9). We (10) could continue to dissect the inadequacies of every item of pedestrian babble on this list provided for Philadelphia's reading pleasure, but since the Metro is (I can only assume) paying you (11) for your writing services, maybe you should put some more time into them yourselves in the future.
cheers!
Mike Pomranz
1) Occasionally Michael is privy to such hacks. But this is very rare.
2) You'd be amazed at how decent Michael's senses are. They remind me of Tipper Gore's senses.
3) Not true. Carrot Top refuses to use this bit in his act "on principle".
4) Dorothy resigned earlier today, stating that letter to the editor writer Michael Pomranz made her realize that she just wasn't cut out for this job.
5) Thank you for addressing me formally, Senor Pomranz.
6) Actually, they were alive then. The Berlin Wall fell in 1990. But math isn't Michael's strong suit. Comedy is, as we can see by...
7) HA! Oh my-HA! Germans with-HAHAHAHAHA! Did he just say that the Germans had pickaxes! No he didn't! I didn't even think about that! (Loud guffawing, reader falls to the floor, holding sides.) Stop it! Stop it, Michael, no more about the Germans! I bet Hitler had a pickaxe! HAHAHAHAHA!
8) If there is one thing your 300 word diatribe to the editor about a 300 word column has taught us, Michael, it is perspective.
9) I'll say you did! Pickaxes! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
10) Did he just invoke the royal "We" in a non-ironic fashion while complaining about a hack writer?
11) They are Mike, but after this tour de force of a letter to the editor, I think they might just be paying someone else to do some writing in the near future ;-) LOL!
- This is kind of sweet. Ben Franklin impersonator Ralph Archbold (above, with duck) is going to marry a Betsy Ross impersonator. I'm still hoping to marry an Ashley Dupre impersonator.
- Quizzo continues to get no respect. The City Paper has a bracket of 76 things that are quintessentially Philly, and quizzo apparently got knocked of early in its conference tournament by the Spiral Q Puppet Theatre and didn't make the dance. Anyhow, the brackets are a lot of fun, and you can vote for Trivia Art over at Foobooz when you fill 'em out.
- Here are Philly natives Tim and Eric in a vodka ad with Zach Galifinakis that is hilarious.
- My kind of movie critic: What distinguishes “Horton Hears a Who!” from the other recent Dr. Seuss film adaptations is that it is not one of the worst movies ever made.
Wow. This is me in 20 years after a tough little league loss.
- What was the name of the woman who accused Clarence Thomas of sexual harassment in 1991?
- For many years, there were rumors of a homosexual affair between between senator Rufus King and this president.
- Gary Condit had an affair with chandra levy while was a Representative from what state?
- In what year did Jim McGreevey state that he was a gay American?
- This Republican, highly critical of Clinton during the Monica Lewinsky scandal, was at the time carrying on an affair himself with a woman named Calista Bisek.
- This founding father was involved in a torrid affair with a woman named Maria Reynolds. A muckraker named James Callendar published letters between the lovers, and it caused the man not to run in the 1800 election.
- Speaking of the 1800 election, another controversy brewed when it was discovered that Thomas Jefferson had a black lover. What was her name?
- Larry Craig tried to have this gay congressman expelled in 1990 after it was discovered that he had allowed a male prostitute to run an escort service out of the congressman's home.
- Gary Hart's run at the presidency was derailed in 1988 because of photos of he and Donna Rice on board this aptly named yacht.
- In 2007, Deborah Pelfrey was charged with running a house of prostitution, a ring had Republican Senator David Vitter as a client. What was her nickname?
- On the comicsvsaudience blog, JGT Head of Security Chip Chantry has a hilarious write up about watching old movies. Read it for laughter.
- Still needed for Quizzo Bowl: bartenders and round girls. Holler if you're interested. What, it's at a boxing venue, I need round girls.
- Quite possibly the least necessary website of all time.
- Quizzo Tonight: Good Dog at 8 p.m., Bards at 10:15 p.m.
Hey, the QB IV tix just came in the mail. They are kind of strangely large. I'll have some on me tonight for sale. $25 a pop, talk to me during quizzo. For more info on QB IV, click here.
Most of you have probably noticed the precipitous plummet of the US dollar on world markets. As of this writing, it is now trading at a low of $1.54 versus the euro. Big deal you might say: the euro is a fairly new currency; historic lows against it don't mean much. But when I last visited Europe in the summer of 2004 it was only trading in the low $1.20's. Even then, experts had begun to speculate that perhaps the euro was destined to become the new world currency.
If you're not convinced something odd is up, then note how the Canadian dollar is on par with the US dollar. In fact, it's worth slightly more. That's the first time that's happened in ages. It indicates that something dire is happening to our economy.
But it goes deeper…
Cut to a mere week and a half ago, when Canada and the US made a historic but little covered agreement, pledging military support to one another in cases of domestic civil disturbance. Jerome Corsi, on WorldNetDaily, correctly notes that the import of the agreement is that it "was not submitted to Congress for approval, nor did Congress pass any law or treaty specifically authorizing this military agreement to combine the operations of the armed forces of the United States and Canada in the event of a wide range of domestic civil disturbances ranging from violent storms, to health epidemics, to civil riots or terrorist attacks."
In other words, the governments of the US and Canada made a decision, without consulting you and your representatives that could have significant military implications over the lives of American citizens...
Welcome to the New World Order. Welcome to the North American Union.
Here's the latest, about how young kids are today that can legally be at the bar. And by extension, how old we've gotten. Can you think of any other things that these kids today have never done, seen, heard, etc.?
Dunno if you caught the story about the Big Brothers Big Sisters program in the Daily News a few days ago, but if not please read it. Here is the impact you could have on a child's life by joining the BBBS program: "I have seen my granddaughter go from being a child who had no voice, who was sad most of the time, to being a new Gloria who is independent, who has high self-esteem, who loves to help people - a Gloria who is going to survive, a Gloria who is going to make it in this world," said the child's maternal grandmother, Gloria Mar.
I also want to thank the quizzo community for the awesome things we've put together these past few months. Every coach, ref, and scorekeeper at the Christian Street YMCA save one is from the quizzo community. And these guys are incredible. One of the coaches was late to his brothers rehearsal dinner so he could be there for his team at the game last Friday night. Amazing. The tutors at the Marian Anderson Center are all from the quizzo community, and I am extremely excited about where the program is going. I suspect that for many of these young teenagers, this is the first time they have ever gotten one-on-one attention in terms of schoolwork. Those who have stepped up and made an effort to help the lives of those around you, I cannot thank you enough. I know there are plenty more of you who want to get involved. Quit thinking about it and do it! If you want to look into making a profound impact on the future of a child's life and therefore the future of this city, please contact Spencer Wright at Big Brothers Big Sisters either by emailing him or by calling 215 701-8100. If you are interested in tutoring (math especially), please contact me.
The Beauty Shop Cafe, aka the place where I get my coffee (corner of 20th and Fitzwater) has signed on as a Quizzo Bowl sponsor. I am a big fan of this place due to it's excellent coffee and baked goods, as well as a few tasty sandwiches. In 2007, their iced coffee was named Best in the City by City Paper. And more importantly, the owner John helps me come up with ideas for my Metro column. So all in all I am a big fan of this place and I am sure that you will be too. Check 'em out on Myspace. I'd like to reiterate that there is no way I coulda made tickets this cheap without our fine sponsors, so I do ask that you give 'em a try. Zipcar, the world's largest car sharing service, is providing financial assistance. Sly Fox Brewery, gold medal winners at the Great American Beer Festival in 2007, will be providing beer. Foobooz, Philly's premier food and drink website, is providing promotional assistance.
My top 10 songs about prostitution. Sorry, but I am just too sick of Roxanne to include it. There are also rumors that "Ticket to Ride" is a song about prostitution, but I'm not sold. I'm sure I've missed some good ones. Let me know what they are below.
SeeqPod - Playable Search
Great event at Triumph Brewery. We had 15 teams, and we had a lot of fun. Herve Villechaize came away with a 97-92 win over Chowdershirt and the Emperor's Club VIPs. Here's the wild card round, "Beer in the Movies". See how ya do. Answers after the jump:
- In what 1976 comedy classic does heavy drinker named Morris Buttermaker drive a bunch of 11 year old kids around drunk in his convertible?
- What brand of beer was being shipped east in the movie Smokey and the Bandit, since it was illegal in the eastern US at the time?
- In what 1986 cult classic would you hear the lines: "Heineken? F*** that s***! Pabst Blue Ribbon!"
- Nicholas Cage played the alcoholic, but who played the prostitute in Leaving Las Vegas?
- What was the name of the hardest drinking fraternity in film history, Animal House?
- This hard drinking poet and short story writer wrote the screenplay for a film called Barfly.
- What was the Irish sounding last name of the brothers in Strange Brew?
- The 1933 comedy The Fatal Glass of Beer stars this legend, who is glad he's dead and not here.
- What was the name of the party where Frank the Tank goes streaking in Old School?
- In what beer comedy would you have found a drinking glass named Das Boot?
First of all, a happy 105th birthday to one of the most stylish men to ever live, Lawrence Welk. Why are there no shows like this on today? Secondly, a happy birthday to Dock Ellis, the only pitcher to ever throw a no-hitter while high on LSD. From classy to trashy, today is the 52nd birthday of Joey Buttafucco. In case you're wondering, he's doing fine and the Long Island Lolita recently released a sex tape. Fisher said in a recent interview that she feels no sympathy for the woman she shot in the face. The interview contains one of the most amazing lines I have ever read: "I feel no sympathy for Mary Jo the multimillionaire! The fact that Mary Jo has a bullet in her head means nothing! I still have silicone in my boobs, and you don't hear me complaining. She can't feel her bullet, and I can't feel my silicone."
A UPenn dental student was held captive for 12 hours begning Sunday night in West Philly, as the criminals ransacked his house. But, as D-Mac points out, this wasn't the interesting part of the story: The student stood by helplessly as the thieves tore through his apartment and was stunned to see them stop to watch reruns of "American Gladiator" and old movies on his TV, Walker said. Now, it would have been one thing if they had watched the new American Gladiators. But these guys stopped, mid-crime, to see how Nitro and Zap fared in the Atlasphere in 1991. Maybe they're just big Larry Csonka fans.
Tickets to Quizzo Bowl IV are on sale now! Just click here or on the link on the upper right hand side of the page and place your order. I found a great fair trade ticket service called Brown Paper Tickets. There is a ridiculously cheap $1.61 surcharge to order online. Tickets are $25 (plus sucharge) per person in advance, $30 at the door. That $25 covers not only the Quiz, Black Elvis, and the Legendary WID, it also covers your drinks, courtesy of SlyFox Beer. Oh, and keep in mind, there is going to be a documentary team there, so your win won't only secure your team $600 cash and free subscriptions to Zipcar, but immortalization in film! I will have tickets ($25 flat) on sale at quizzo starting on Wednesday. Team max is 8 people, and if you attend, you must play. If you have any questions, let me know.
Considered by many to be the greatest Shakespearean actor of the 19th century, this man bought the Walnut Street Theatre in 1865.
I'm too lazy to snoop around for what fun stuff is going on for Beer Week this week, and let's face it, so are you. And we're both too poor for fancy beer dinners. So I asked the lovely Ginger to give us a Cliff Notes/Beer on a Budget version of the highlights of the coming week. Here are some things Philly's Beer Lass recommends:
Thank goodness. It's here. Philly Beer week is really here. After Months of preparing my liver for mass amounts of beer-I think I'm ready. Hopefully, you are too. With over 130 competing events, we might not get to see each other too much... But here's my agenda and perhaps we can have a beer or two here or there. Lots of events are already sold out. I decided not to do the fancy shmancy dinner thing and set up a bunch of casual nights like happy hours, quizzes, and runs. Runs? Well-run. I am co hosting the only event of the week involving any sort of athleticism. Here's my line up, and a few other fun events.
For more info, go to phillybeerweek.org. And check out my blog. Hope to see you this week!
Alright, I've been catching up lately on some of the great movies I never saw the first time around, so that I can be kool. Here are three reviews for movies I recently saw for the first time.
Blue Velvet. I loved Twin Peaks, so it should come as no surprise that I thoroughly enjoyed Blue Velvet. Sexy, scary, and surreal (often in the same scene), the movie was a pure buzz from start to finish. I enjoyed the characters, the dialogue, the plot, everything. Dennis Hopper is downright amazing, as is Isabella Rossellini. And though I didn't like Maclachlan's character as much as I did in Twin Peaks (possibly my favorite tv character of all time.), he was still very solid. This one gets an A-
The Magnificent Seven. A fun movie, really good Western soundtrack, some really great actors. Still, certainly not my favorite Western of all time. A little too cheesy (if that's at all possible for a 60s Western) and all of the deaths were as melodramatic as possible, with essentially every character getting off some famous last words. I did, however, thoroughly enjoy Eli Wallach as the head of the bandits, and I liked the fact that they had their reasons for ransacking the village (they were starving, and hey, a bandit's gotta eat.) All in all, an enjoyable movie (and one that will make my next viewing of Three Amigos much more enjoyable), but not an epic one. (Keep in mind I am grading in comparison to other great movies, not to regular movies). C+
Blow Out. This 1981 Brian de Palma film is a joyride for most of the flick, though it gets a little silly at the end. Great storyline. A presidential candidate has his car tire blown out, car plunges into creek, and he dies but the hooker with him lives. A sound guy for a lowgrade slasher films (John Travolta) happens to be recording nearby and picks up the gunshot on his microphone. The government is trying to cover this up, and a maniacal John Lithgow (the shooter) is trying to kill the hooker to make sure she stays quiet. Travolta develops a crush on the hooker, played by de Palma's wife at the time, Nancy Allen. Convoluted, but de Palma makes it tie together nicely, and it is gripping until the closing chase, which is melodramatic and ridiculous to the point of being laugh out loud funny (super-slow motion, giant American flag, fireworks, etc.) . But the little tie in to slasher films at the end is a nice touch. The reason to watch this film in the first place, though, is that the whole thing takes place in 1980 Philadelphia, with a special cameo by the Forum Theatre. Lots of good city scenes, and the car driving through City Hall is fun. It is worth checking out for the Philly stuff, the plot is fast and fun, and Travolta is actually pretty damn good in this. B
Questions about beers of the world, about beer in movies, beer in songs,and much, much, more. Plus a chance to check out some of Triumph Brewery's beers for only $4 a pop, and free appetizers. Hosted by me, the Lovely Ginger, and some local brewers. Action starts at Triumph Brewing Company (117 Chestnut) at 8 p.m. tonight. Hope to see you there!
According to Wilson Pickett, 634-5789 is the number to what town?
Who was the star of the movie Phone Booth?
What number to a hotel room in Manhattan is the oldest number in use in New York City? (Hint: Think Glenn Miller.)
Who made it to the patent office a few hours after Bell with essentially the same patent?
This Alfred Hitchcock movie was based on a BBC television play and starred Grace Kelly?
On March 10th, 1876, Alexander Graham Bell made the first telephone calls, so questions under pics of winners will be about telephones. One guess per person.
O'NEALS
- Beer Week? Every Week is Beer Week 106
- The Number of Delegates Hillary is Behind by is 95
- We Got Nothing 94
- Young, Old, and Restless 94
- Anybody Hiring? 64
- Western Omelette 99
- We Married a Mormon 93
- Narcotyzing Dysfunktion 89
- Terry Frank Please 81
- Take Your Sox off During Sex 72
- We're #51 (aka Jams) 109
- Totally Predictable 92
- Sister Mary's Home for Bad Girls 91
- This is Not a Bus 90
- Susan's Peters 89
- Duane's World 104
- Roadhouse Blues 101
- Superdelegates 85
- Too Raunchy for My Shirt 85
- Weapons of Ass Destruction 75
- I Heart Huckabee 88
- Fort Awesome 84
- Table By the Window 69
- The Underachievers 61
- Olorkori 51
- Sofa Kingdom 98
- Cutz Dat Flow 5
- Hurtin Bombs 88
- Western Omelette 87
- Marketable Commodities 86
Hey guys,the quizzo on Monday should be a blast. Here's how it's gonna work: It costs $5 to play, BUT all of that money goes to the winning team. So if we get a good turnout, we'll have a good payout. GOnna be a great chance to checkout a new bar and try some of their beers, which will all be $4. And I'm hosting it, so you know it'll be fun. Hope to see you there!
Sorry, but I am a big fan of lists (and a big fan of bars), so I"m gonna harp on this a little bit longer. Here are ten bars I think shoulda been on the list, and for the sake of being impartial, I won't include the ones where I work.
- Cantina. Shocking that this didn't make the cut. Great food, great margaritas.
- Nick's Roast Beef. An oasis of calm in a sea of d-baggery, Nick's has good cheap food, solid bartenders who know their sports, and that great roast beef sandwich. I love the Nick's in South Philly as well.
- Jose Pistollas. Great beer selection and one of their two bars has no TVs which I am a big proponent of.
- Plough and the Stars. On the weekend, this place turns into toolbag central, but during the week it is a beautiful bar with good food and a gorgeous fireplace.
- Dirty Frank's. How did Dirty Frank's not make the list? This place is legendary, and I hear they have great fights on quizzo night.
- Speaking of legends, Doobie's has great bartenders, a great jukebox, and a solid late night menu.
- Brigid's. This is one of the city's great first date spots. The food is great but not expensive, the ambience is cozy, and they have a lot of interesting beers.
- Ray's Happy Birthday Bar. Only been a couple of times, but it's a great South Philly spot with tons of character.
- The Khyber. Like the Cantina, I was shocked that this funky dive didn't make it. An Old City institution.
- XIX. Who says a classy bar can't make the list? Gorgeous bar, great service, and happy hour specials that make drinks here almost cheap enough for you and me.
Who do you think got the shaft?
I was hanging out with a beer owner, a brewer, two industry folks, and a local beer whiz last night, and we were discussing PW's best bars issue. After a while we decided to put together a list of the worst bars in the city. Here's what we came up with:
- Fox and the Hound. A few years ago, Art and I made the mistake of watching a game there. They had country music playing instead of the game audio. We asked the bartender if they could turn the game volume on. The waitress said, "Oh we can never do anything like that without discussing it with corporate." I've never been back. Terrible, terrible place to watch the game.
- Kildare's. Soul sucking faux bar for Jerseyites and Manayunkers on a big trip to the city. Then again, I hear they have a great quizzo.
- Glam. I've never actually been in Glam, but I am 100% sure it is one of the worst bars in the city. I mean, it's named Glam.
- Fat Tuesday's. Too bad Katrina didn't wipe this place out.
- Tiki Bob's. When Jerseyites and Manayunkers wanna dance after a few Irish car bombs at Kildare's, they hop in their Hummers and head here.
What places am I missing out on?
Hey gang, gonna be hosting an all-beer quizzo on Monday at Triumph Brewing Company at 8 p.m. I'll have more details on Monday, but I know they are gonna have lots of drink specials and some nice prizes. And, while knowledge of beer will be a plus, those who have played my science quizzos at the Franklin know that this will not be an extremely technical quiz.
Well, I'm still smarting from PW's slight, but I must be a bigger man (however, if I have not received a formal apology from PW in 24 hours, I will be exacting my revenge) and get past it. Each of the contributers (myself included) were asked to list 10 of our favorite bars. Here was my list (in no particular order):
- North Third
- Bards
- Oscar's
- Good Dog
- Fish Bar at FriSatSun
- Locust Rendezvous
- Jose Pistollas
- Black Sheep
- O'Neals
- Standard Tap
Make of that what you will. In hindsight, I might have subbed the Cantina for Fish Bar, though Fish Bar is a great place for a date, on the off chance I ever have one. Still, I am shocked that Cantina did not make the cut. That was a huge oversight. Last summer, we did a poll of best bars in Philly and it resulted in the Cantina losing by two measly votes to the Standard Tap. I'll have a list of the other bars that shoulda made the cut, those that shouldn't have been on the list, and the worst bars in Philly later on today.
This weeks column is on words I love and words I hate. What are some words that feel good to say, and what are some that nd awful?
- Eagles set on trading for either Roy Williams or Chad Johnson, according to the source that broke the Asante Samuel deal.
- Steve O. is going to be on WIP Thursday morning at around 9 a.m. talking about, get ready for this, the results of tonight's American Idol. I'm not kidding. In other news, I have just lost all respect for Steve O.
- Obama lost Ohio and Texas, and we here at JGT headquarters are pretty dejected today. In fact, there is only one thing that has cheered us up all day: The Obama mariachi song! This is real, not a spoof.
- Happy birthday wishes to Canaan Banana, Zimbabwe's first president. He is best known for having the name Canaan Banana.
The Sixers have been playing in front of crowds similar in size to the ones who went to see the Pittsburgh Pythons before they hired astrologist Stockard Channing and changed their name to the Pisces and surrounded Moses Guthrie (played by Dr. J) with offbeat but talented role players. But I was surprised to open up my email from Travelzoo today and see that Sixers tix were $10. And the funny thing is, this is the most exciting team they've had since 2001. A lot of good young players with a lot of upside, a likable coach, and a fast breaking offense.
A few months ago, the Weekly approached me and asked me to tell them my 10 favorite bars for their upcoming "Beer Issue". I happily obliged (free of charge, mind you), then today I opened it up to see which bars made the cut. I'm reading through when I came to this little gem: Fergie's Pub. Philly's Best quizzo (sorry Johnny Goodtimes) on Tuesday and Thursday nights... Now, this is no Philly Style Mag/Kildare's situation. I have nothing but respect for Pat Hines, the Godfather of Philly quizzo, and nothing but love for Fergie's, which is truly a great bar. And I'm sure that "Who hosts a better quiz, Pat or JGT?" is a perfectly legitimate argument. But not here. Not when I was a contributer to the freaking report. Rude! They also had Art and Tommy Up help with this report, and nowhere did I see that they were Philly's 2nd best food blogger or 2nd best party promoter. Anyways, Philly Weekly, if you wanna make it up to me, I'll let you know how. Just contact me.
BONUS THREAT! D-Mac, if you want to see Season 2 of Gladiators amongst friends without being forced to partake in a little something I like to call the "Hit and Run", you had better make sure this gets cleared up.
UPDATED:
BUY TICKETS HERE. First of all, what we already knew: Quizzo Bowl IV will be held on Saturday, March 29th at the Legendary Blue Horizon on 1314 North Broad Street at 8 p.m. But now's the time to give you guys the scoop on what is going to be one of the most amazing shows in Philadelphia in 2008.
Headlining the show will be the biggest legend to ever hail from Johnny's hometown of Nassawadox, VA: Black Elvis (aka Clearance Giddens). Black Elvis has been entertaining folks in Eastern Virginia for over 15 years, and reached the pinnacle of his fame in 1992 with an appearance on the Arsenio Hall Show and a role in the movie Honeymoon in Vegas. He continued to make occasional appearances on the Shore afterwards, but has only recently decided to begin a full fledged comeback, similar to the one that white Elvis undertook in 1968. Clearance begins his comeback at Quizzo Bowl IV.
Doing a show in a building that had the word "legendary" in the title meant that my halftime act could only be one man: the Legendary WID. Wid used to sell out shows regularly at the historic Bottom Line in New York in the 1980s and has appeared on television countless times, from the old days on Make Me Laugh to a recent appearance on Fox's 30 Seconds to Fame. Moreover, Wid is viewed as a legend by essentially every young comedian in the Philadelphia area, because not only is his brand of comedy sheer genius, but he goes out of his way to encourage and help new comedians in the local area. To see a bit of one of the Wid's performances, click here. Opening for the WID will be longtime Johnny Goodtimes contributer and the 3rd place finisher in Philly's funniest competition last year, Chip Chantry.
And who is helping to make this event possible and keep ticket prices at a minimum? Zipcar has agreed to help sponsor the Quizzo Bowl, as have Sly Fox and Foobooz. Zipcar is a company that allows people to rent a car for a few hours at a time, and everything can be done online. When you sign up, you get a Zipcard. Once you have a Zipcard, you just make a reservation online, walk up to the car, unlock it with your Zipcard, and drive off. Gas and insurance are included. Pretty kool. The Locust Rendezvous, perhaps the most affordable bar in Center City, located at Broad and Locust, is also helping keep ticket prices to a minimum. As most of you know, Foobooz is Philadelphia's premiere food and beverage website, run by one Mr. Trivia Art. The website has quickly established itself as a favorite of local gourmets and gourmands alike, and has received high praise from the City Paper, Philly Mag, and Philly Style Mag. Our third sponsor is Sly Fox Beer, who are going to provide the booze! Sly Fox opened their brewery and restaurant in Phoenixville in 1995, and have since expanded to Royersford. The brewery's beers have medalled twice at the Great American Beer Festival and Sly Fox was named 3rd best brewpub in America on beeradvocate.com in 2003 and was named Best Brewery in Philadelphia by Philly Mag in 2004. The Beauty Shop Cafe, located on the corner of 20th and Fitzwater, is a great little coffee shop with great coffee, great tea (tea's my new thing, trying to slow down on the coffee), and great snacks. The Philadelphia Pretzel Factory is cutting me a great deal on soft pretzels for snacks.
To purchase tickets, you can either click here or buy them from me at the various quizzos I perform at during the week.
For more info about Quizzo Bowl IV, click here. If you still have any questions, please contact me.
Lots going on tonight. Quizzo at O'Neals at 8 p.m., and the Lovely Ginger is gonna swing by to get people excited about Beer Week. If you plan on playing at the Bards at 10 p.m., why not check out a free comedy show beforehand? Some of Philly's best comedians, including Chip Chantry and Pat House, will be trying to earn a spot in the huge comedy festival that is going on in Montreal this summer. Comedy show starts at 8 p.m. at Helium (20th and Sansom), and reservations are recommended. Also quizzo going down at Triumph tonight at 9 p.m. tonight. Hope to see you tonight!
Apparently, there was a bit of a rumble at the quizzo at Dirty Frank's last week. According to Quizmaster Chris's website: The game was delayed repeatedly by a drunken, violent Frank's employee who no one seemed completely interested in controlling or removing. Apparently hitting people, loudly challenging the entire bar to a fight and throwing furniture isn't enough to get a person fired let alone flagged, even barred within the same evening. Koob of the Kingdom was there, so I asked him for some more details, and he said: Some guy got hammered and him and his buddy started fake wrestling and it got kind of out of hand and it seemed like it was turning into an actual fight and then there was some girl in the middle of it crying and stuff. I didn't really pay attention. I think he slapped the bouncer in the face at one point and eventually he left.
Last night I played at Tangier and then talked to Irish John afterwards. He told me that one time, some guy started shouting out answers, so he went over to him and: "I didn't hit him hard enough to knock him down, but I hit him hard enough to let him know that he needed to quit shouting out the ******* answers." One time he caught a guy in the bathroom with an encyclopedia. A few weeks later, this same guy left midway through a round after the question, "What is in a B-52?" was asked. He reappeared a few minutes later with the correct answer. Turns out, he had walked to the bar next door, asked the bartender what was in a B-52, and then returned. John gave him a lifetime ban. Of course, I almost got into a fight at Dark Horse quizzo once. But without question, my favorite quizzo attack was this one.
Marion Cotillard thinks that the US knocked down the twin towers, just like the Donspiracist. I am absolutely positive that this administration had nothing to do with 9/11. As one commenter put it: It would be impossible for this administration to have pulled off a 9/11 coverup. they are simply too incompetent to even come close to pulling off something this complex.
According to the movie Breaking Away*, what are townies in Bloomington known as?
*which I saw for the first time over the past weekend. Not bad. I like Mooch.
- First of all, major Quizzo Bowl announcements coming tomorrow on the site, as I will be filling you in on the band, sponsors, and the halftime act. Gonna try to send out my press release manana as well. It's about time to get this party started.
- Over at Foobooz, Trivia Art is trying to find a new word for that most unappetizing term, gastropub. Winner of best new term wins a $25 gift certificate to the cantina.
- Tomorrow night, why not have a Tuesday night on the town? Start at 8 p.m. at Helium, where Chip Chantry is one of several local comedians trying out for a major Comedy Festival in Montreal this summer. The show is FREE, just make reservations first. Should wrap up at around 10 p.m., just in time to head over to the Bards for some quizzo.
The weekend started inauspiciously, with a tough loss for my Little League basketball team on Friday night. But on Saturday I got some revenge, as my Senior League team avenged it's only loss this year with a big win. We then kicked off our tutoring program at the Marian Anderson Center, which was pretty awesome. We had about a dozen kids volunteer for the program (and I'm confident more will follow), and I had 6 volunteer tutors from the quizzo world show up, which was great.
Saturday night went to Southwark for dinner. Bar is beautiful, service was terrific, food was good though not spectacular. Swung by O'Neals afterwards for a drink. I was there when Andre Igoudala hit that 55 footer against the Suns. Don't you hate it when someone is telling you a story and something like that happens and you have ADD so you can't help but throw your hands up in the air and the person you're with just thinks you're a bad listener and that's probably why you're 33 and single? Yeah, I hate it when that happens too.
Sunday, was gonna grab brunch with Trivia Art and his mom and then get some work done. Well, the brunch part went according to plan; the getting work done part not so much. Had brunch at 707. Places like that are a little too trendy and stuffy for my taste, but the french toast was really good. Decided to stop into Jose Pistollas to see the Lovely Ginger (who was behind the bar) and have a quick drink. Well, fun person after fun person filed through the door, and the next thing you know it's 6 p.m. and four of us are heading out to the Palestra for the Temple-St. Joe's game. Had a buddy round up two tix and leave them for us. We scalped another two for $25 total (Negotiating with scalpers is one of my hidden talents.) and headed through the door. The Palestra is a shrine, the place was packed, and the game was incredible, coming down to the final shot. Ended the weekend in Mad Mex discussing the legalities of a coup d'etat against Phillies ownership (apparently, coup d'etats are illegal.)
This singer played Sonny Crockett's wife in Miami Vice.
This Phillie icon was born in Miami in 1944.
Florida's state mammal is endangered and lives in the sea, and Jeb Bush signed into law a bill that helped to reduce their population further.
This Florida Secretary of State helped propel GW Bush into the presidency in 2000.
What is the largest city in Florida, population wise?
What man landed in Florida in April of 1513?
Gonna post pics of last weeks winners. It was on this date in 1845 that Florida became a date, so all questions will pertain to Florida. One guess per person.
