Win Sort of Big Prizes in the 1st Annual JGT Bad Writing Contest!
I am hereby offering Two tickets to the Academy of Natural Sciences and a $20 gift certificate to the Bards for whoever writes worst opening sentence to a non-existent novel (I'll give a little leeway for an extra sentence, but total must be 75 words or less). 2nd place gets a $10 certificate to O'Neals. Historical fiction, sci-fi, romance novel, whatever. But here's the twist: Your sentence must include the words "Alf Landon". Alright, just send your opening sentence to me by Monday, September 15th at 5 p.m., and we'll post them and vote next week. I'll start us off with mine.
Alf Landon looked across the plains, the vast magnificent plains, and dipped his spoon into his Tapioca pudding.

