F'ers Win, Devastasted by Bad News

The F'ers used a perfect final round to come from behind and defeat the Omelette at the Bards on Tuesday night, 108-97. Their elation was short lived, however, as soon after the contest they learned that their hero Tom Delay had been struck by a meteor, and was in serious condition in a nearby hospital. "The timing was all wrong" said Whippy Carmichael of the F'ers. "We were going to help him overthrow the Supreme Court, and then help him beat this bogus ethics charge, perpetuated by the left wing syndicate and, as Tom once called them, the Communist News Network (CNN). And then he had to go and get hit by that damn meteor."